Monday, June 20

Learning from Captain Jack Sparrow

Captain Jack Sparrow

I watched the first Pirates of the Caribbean film with my kids the other day and found myself wishing I could meet, maybe run off with for a while, or even be Captain Jack Sparrow. He's not even real, just a fictitious character, although Johnny Depp who plays him is gorgeous enough. I even checked to see if there is a Facebook page about Jack Sparrow - there is! - and thought about dying my hair dark and changing the way I dress.

You may think I'm crazy but this fantasy was a lot of fun and I've calmed down a bit over the last few days. I've also discussed it with my husband and he also would love to dress like a pirate at times and roam the world in total freedom.

Now it's not only the fact that Jack Sparrow is a pirate that's the appealing thing - none of the other pirates in the film had any effect on me. It's that Jack is meant to be this tough and mean pirate Captain yet he's so totally in touch with his vulnerability and other more sensitive characteristics, and is unashamedly happy to display them. He also has a delicious sense of humour, is basically a 'good guy', and is just a little crazy. He's the opposite to how we are meant to behave in our sophisticated Western societies. And even though he is meant to be on the wrong side of the law he in fact is more moral and achieves greater good than the guys on the 'right' side.

The lesson in the fascination for me included to lighten up a little, to remember to question the rules our culture and its institutions want us to live by and make sure they are really right for me, and generally to get back in touch with energies that being a responsible parent doesn't allow for.

If others are also feeling the attraction of the eccentric pirate energy of Jack Sparrow, which I suspect they are, given the huge popularity of the movie, maybe there's a lesson in his character for us all?

For more information about how we all identify with only a small part of ourselves and so are attracted to our disowned parts in other people, see my website

For how this works in our romantic relationships, see The Greatest Relationship Secret

Captain Jack Sparrow


Anonymous said...

I have an observation about the pirate type of man. The trouble is that more often than not we believe the 'bad' guy actually has a heart of gold just like this character. Unfortunately the bad boy is often just what he is and hasn't got a heart of gold. I think girls and women believe, as I have, that bad means good and good means bad and this confusion comes from powerful stories like this. Also Enid Blyton, a children's author, who portrayed the crooks of men with hearts of gold if you just look hard enough, held this position. Later on in life, this false image results in getting involved and then hurt with a true pirate. And if a woman then wonders where she went so wrong, maybe it's this sort of powerful conditioning when young that results in a lot of confusion later on.

Astra Niedra said...

I believe you are right - in reality often the bad boy is just what he is: a bad boy. Each self (there are many selves in the human psyche - if you are not familiar with this idea, please see my web site or for an explanation) is what it is, and if a person is identified with a particular self, then that person will have the characteristics, feelings, values of that self - there will be little else available to the person, or if there is then the most primary self will usually control how the person behaves.

I think most conditioning of girls comes from culture in general, and from parents and schools, rather than from particular films such as this one, which I actually think questions some stereotypes (the female lead rejects Jack Sparrow and goes for William and she rejects society's expectations of her and finds her strength and other, more pirate-like, energies).

When girls and women are attracted to bad boys it is because they have disowned in themselves, or at least don't feel it is acceptable to express, the energies the 'bad boy' owns. Such a woman is most likely identified with some sort of good girl or mother, and probably has romantic ideas about the bad boy lifestyle. She is attracted to him as she is projecting her disowned bad-boyishness onto him, which tends to include such qualities as adventurousness and freedom, something which, for instance, many teenage girls crave, a craving which is intensified during those years because teenagers are pressured to buckle down and study and be so not-free at a time when they are wanting to explore the world outside the family home. Many adult women too who are identified with responsibility in some form would be attracted to bad boy energy, or they might judge it, or both, at different times.

But if the good girl had some Aware Ego (again see web sites for info) and was able to access other selves within her own psyche, and find her own pirate energy, then she would no longer be drawn to real life pirates and would instead seek a different type of man.

And if the bad boy also would unhook from the total identification with that energy, then he might find a good boy within himself who did in fact have a heart of gold!

Anonymous said...